The title is not ours, it is borrowed from this article by Tom Kenyon. The article explains, in detail, how to go about it, in the author's opinion.
The "secret", in a nutshell, is this:
The task here is to be true to your vision while paying attention to what the current reality is showing you. It is not about pretending. It is about facing reality as it presents itself to you while simultaneously holding a higher vision. In other words, you deal with the reality of your life while simultaneously holding the vision of a different life. This is the art.
But do visit the page and read it in its entirety.
It probably has the type of information that you came here looking for.
P.S. No, she is not back.
Perhaps some other time. :-)